After many, many years, you will have some intuition for the physics you studied. Then, in 2016, encouraged by her husband, Michael, she submitted her DNA to a genealogical website. I would think of the three of themmy mother, my father, Ben Waldenall burying the consequences of their actions so deep that it seemed there weren't any consequences at all. For every gene, you get two copies one from your mom and one from your dad. Her experience, after the initial shock, was positive. Gone rogue. As I scrolled through websites and online essays, words swam; sentences broke apart. On tour, every event has been wall to wall. Their convergence is the story of my life. 2019 CBS Interactive Inc. All Rights Reserved. Dani Shapiro is the bestselling author of five memoirs, Inheritance, Hourglass , Still Writing , Devotion, and Slow Motion, and five novels including Black & White and Family History. Born and raised in the city of London, Alexander Johnson studied biology and chemistry in college and went on to earn a PhD in biochemistry. list of walmart distribution centers dani shapiro biological father ben walden She didnt let the love triangle continue (thank God). With the help of her husband, a former investigative journalist, Shapiro began following the new clues Ancestry.com had given her. I shape it into a story. In his writing, Alexander covers a wide range of topics, from cutting-edge medical research and technology to environmental science and space exploration. The screen went black, and then his name appeared in white sans serif type: Dr. Ben Walden speaking at Reed College, Portland, Oregon. At the end of Inheritance, Eragon is seventeen years old. But rather than calling the police and getting professional support, Archer takes control. He had a pale complexion, but his cheeks were pink, his color high. This throws her into a tailspin of questioning her identity, her family relationships, and her cultural heritage. As , EL NORTE is a melodrama divided into three acts. I had already found my biological father. Biological. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Superfecundation is the fertilization of two or more ova from the same cycle by sperm from separate acts of sexual intercourse, which can lead to twin babies from two separate biological fathers. . I stumbled upon words I hated: apparently Ben Walden was my bio-dad. DNA testing can be performed with a toothbrush, hair, ear wax, condom, nail clippings, dental floss and more. He asked me if I could accept the two tributariesthese two fathers I come from. A Buddhist teacher. But I had carried these things a long way in my heart. I had no appetite. Im not saying its impossiblebut Ive never heard a story in which the mother didnt know.. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". I was that snake. Ive Always Been Terrible at Drawing. The audience in Portland were now raising their hands. I didnt need her services. Ethics of donor anonymity. can you have a pet raccoon in vermont. I was unable to entertain on any level the thought that my parents had known all our shared lives. Our Own Devices: Sean Doolittle on Writing a Thriller About Technology. We all make narratives of our lives: stories weve inherited, or told ourselves, and burnished down the years. Why do you think that?. People are doing DNA testing just for kicks, and getting the shock of their lives. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. Just as I dialed Kramer, a woman came with her bagged lunch and plopped herself at the small table next to me. BookTok is Good, Actually: On the Undersung Joys of a Vast and Multifarious Platform, 10 Crime Novels You Should Read This March, 11 Speculative Fiction Titles Out in 2023 Perfect for Crime Fans, Women Outside the Structure: Victorian Widows and Governesses. This is happening all the time. It would be months before I knew what she had really said to Ben: "How could you have been so stupid? Paul Shapiro was my social dad. The imprint of pogroms, of the difficulties and sorrows of immigrant life was not mineat least not in a physical sense. Ben and Pilar had read three of my books and were in the middle of a book Michael had written about foreign aid. As she grew older, this otherness a disconnect she carried with her all the time grew more and more powerful. As he leans his head forward to press the tip of his cigarette to the car's . It was the night before Yom Kippur, and I hoped to light them to honor my parents, but we had none. dani shapiro biological father ben walden. Five syllablesseven if you included the title. mame kurogouchi:2(M):119:57:61:50 . As , EL NORTE is a melodrama divided into three acts. From that information and after some detective work, she manages to trace and find her biological father, Ben Walden, a doctor who . Grayson begins to see who she is and realizes he was wrong and makes it very clear that he will protect Avery, but they cannot be together. This is my 10th book, she says. Foreign particles from food, liquids, toothpaste and tobacco byproducts dont alter the DNA but they can mask it. I had begun to explore the halachah, the body of Jewish law, as it pertained to the subject of donor insemination. Someone must have decided it would be in this couples best interest to add donor sperm to the mix without telling them. I was dimly aware of my own gratitude. What I wanted: confirmation from someonean expertthat it was possible, no, more than possible, likely, no, more than likely, absolutely the case, that my parents had known nothing. It was pretty much said every day of my life that I dont look Jewish, Shapiro recently told JewishBoston. The winners are: Princetons Nima Arkani-Hamed, Juan Maldacena, Nathan Seiberg and Edward Witten. Also called hereditary. My parents created a myth. Your father is still your father. You need to ask yourself questions and then do problems to answer those questions. Parents were told to go home and forget it ever happened. ", "It just never occurred to me that I might have biological children out there," he said. Disparate worlds had been floating and colliding within me all my life. The test results revealed far more than she could have imagined: The man who had raised her, supported her, and loved. The mother always knew, Kramer went on. The phrases made me feel like a freak of science. I had no time to find a more private perch. "Then you wrote me again," Ben said. I clung to the only story I could tolerate. Shapiro was an only child whose parents had both died, but she had an older half sister from her father's first marriage, whom she had never much gotten . His revenge plot goes wrong when he accidentally kills a student, giving Morgan a hold over him. It's my faith. Perhaps if she gazed at herself for long enough, a new face would emerge from behind her own: a truer one, a face that would better reflect her sense of herself. An American Rabbi. Her memoir, Asylum: A Memoir of Family Secrets, is out now. I watched the passing cars on Wilshire Boulevard. Email her at judy@jewishboston.com. I stopped at a nail salon that had a small metal table with two chairs on the sidewalk out front, and asked the proprietors if they minded my sitting there. In every audience, there is a significant number of people who have discovered family secrets of their own: adoptees who were never told; donor-conceived people who never knew; parents who made a decision not to disclose the truth to their children, but who now realise that is no longer viable; older men not my usual kind of reader who have been anonymous donors, and who have either already been contacted [by their biological children], or who believe theres a good chance they might be., Shapiro believes that in the US there is currently a kind of epidemic in terms of the numbers of people who are learning the truth about their identity. Shapiro suggests a face-to-face meeting after exchanging polite but cautious emails with Ben. (For the record: Grayson. Well, they were certainly struck by her appearance. "The irony for me is my mother, who is my biological parent, is not someone that I ever felt bonded to," Shapiro said. Can you do a paternity test with a toothbrush? Shapiro has white-blonde hair and blue eyes. Perhaps if she gazed at herself for long enough, a new face would emerge from behind her own: a truer one, a face that would better reflect her sense of herself. Records, heavily coded, were sealed or destroyed. Weeks later an email arrived, containing their results. But here, I was back in the thick sludge. It became quickly apparent that the community of the donor-conceived was robust and active. Inheritance is dedicated to my father. Let's ask the author to read from the very beginning of her new novel, "Signal Fires." DANI SHAPIRO: (Reading) And it's nothing really or might be nothing or ought to be nothing. Susie looked like him, whereas she looked like no one in their family. It seemed purposeful, Ben's phrase. On this day my entire being was trying to absorb as much as possible. The cast originally included Kate Mara of House of Cards fame, but she was replaced by Collins due to scheduling changes, according to a report from Deadline Hollywood. SHAPIRO: Yeah, the little boy's name is Waldo Shenkman. The first, titled Arturo Xuncax, is set in an Indian village in Guatemala. Dani's biological father was a medical student earning a bit of extra cash as a sperm donor. Who is Ben Walden Dani Shapiro? Well, your blood is definitely all your ownyour body produced it. Annie Wermiel. That was what my mother had said, wasnt it? fordham university counseling psychology; dani shapiro biological father ben walden But there was something I had promised myself I would say, and I said it as soon as I had an opening to cut through the polite chitchat. Father. But here, I was back in the thick sludge. During that time, she'd published Inheritance, in which Shapiro delves into her shocking. Lawsuits claim dental device wrecked teeth, New FDA-approved drug can slow vision loss, Murdaugh trial heads into closing arguments, New drug could slow one type of vision loss. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. In every other area of my life I was capable of clear thought. Shapiro later learned it was common for such clinics like Farriss to mix the sperm of men with a low sperm count with donor sperm. And there, I caught a flash of myself in the mirror in the hotel ballroom, and saw myself the way other people see me for the first time. This thriller stars Golden Globe nominee Lily Collins, BAFTA nominee Simon Pegg and Chace Crawford (Gossip Girl). Test tube tots. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Dani Shapiro's memoir unfolds at a breakneck pacepart mystery, part real-time investigation, part rumination on the ineffable combination of memory, history, biology, and experience that makes us who we are. Paul Shapiro was my social dad. It took three clicks to get there. Ive always tried to make meaning out of things that are difficult, she says. MITs Alan , In 2020, as a response to the disruption caused by COVID-19, the College Board modified the AP exams so they were shorter, administered online, covered less material, and had a different format than previous tests. Toby Hawthorne is NOT her biological father. This is complex. The clinic Shapiro's parents used undertook work that was off the books; unregulated, unethical, and the last resort for desperate couples. Choking on the elephant. Shapiro learns her biological father's identity with stunning ease. He did the right thing, she says. You realize how unusual it is that you found your donor, she said. Dani Shapiro's Jewish mother gave birth to her after artificial insemination including sperm from the beloved Jewish father who . Who knew if we would ever be together again? 05 Jun 2022 hamilton township recycling calendar 13th March 2022 - bydeadman trail horseshoe canyon. . Ben Walden didnt occupy the deepest, most tender part of my attention. Writer Dani Shapiro always wondered why she didn't look like her dad - until a casual conversation with her mum let slip a shocking secret. Buy it from guardianbookshop.com for 8.79, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning. NFTs Simplified > Uncategorized > dani shapiro biological father ben walden. It is a bit of a national obsession. After the patriarch of a powerful family passes away, he entrusts his daughter with a secret that no longer wants to remain buried. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The creator of The Donor of Sibling Registry. The glint of eyeglasses. I talk to him more; I feel him around me more. Somewhere, in the background, echoed the comments I had fielded just about every day for 54 years: You sure you're Jewish? Dani and her husband, Michael, began to unravel a complex story that her late parents, members of a prominent Jewish family, had never shared with her. Copyright 2019 by Dani Shapiro. My sense of otherness derived from theseand only thesefacts. NPR's Melissa Block talks with Shapiro about her book. You could have gotten us bread from the Nazis., Shapiro is the author of several bestselling memoirs, her stock-in-trade the public unpicking of lifes more complicated knots. Why Are So Many Young Men Single And Sexless? Shapiro had always known that her parents had fertility problems. 5 Jun. It was, she says, as though she was trapped on the other side of an invisible wall, separate and cut off and yet, she had no idea why. They iden- tify with the unknown father, to whom they attribute all the personal characteristics that they cannot trace to others. 'And she said, 'Artificial insemination.'". Her ownership of me. He also shares personal stories and insights from his own journey as a scientist and researcher. "And it showed that we were not sisters. She wonders now if she wasnt looking for a new family. When Michael and I arrived back home, I looked through the cupboards for my usual stock of memorial candles. I would light no candles in memory of my complicated, beloved, dead parents on the night that I met Ben Walden. I had never spoken its language or become steeped in its customs. As Shabbos candles were burning in New Jersey on a Friday night last May, Dani Shapiro was doing a book reading of her latest memoir, Hourglass, at Powell's City of Books in Portland. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Mass Shooters and the Myth That Evil Is Obvious, Transforming Empathy Into Compassion: Why It Matters, INHERITANCE: A Memoir of Genealogy, Paternity, and Love. All rights reserved. By Dani Shapiro published January 2, 2019 - last reviewed on May 20, 2019. I signed this one "With love.". From the Book: INHERITANCE: A Memoir of Genealogy, Paternity, and Love by Dani Shapiro. To attempt to order the chaos.. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. Dani, aged around five, on the beach with the man she thought was her father. . Literary giants have thoughts on the new edits to Roald Dahl's works. I found myself wanting to reach out to Wendy Kramerbut why? Wittenberg is a nationally ranked liberal arts institution with a particular strength in the sciences. June 5, 2022 Posted by: Category: Uncategorized Unlike Jo, Alcott never married or had biological children (although she cared for her young niece, nicknamed Lulu, until the authors death in 1888 at age 55). Inheritance is a devastating and haunting interrogation of the meaning of kinship and identity, written with stunning intensity and . Both men had been in the Peace Corps. But because of how the genetics of blood type works, it could seem like you have your moms blood type, your dads blood type, or a mix of the two. A lawyer from Chicago. She lives with her family in LItchfield County, Connecticut. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Vogue, and Time. Shapiro was closer by far to her father, who was not biologically related to her, than to her mother, who never stopped reminding her daughter that it was to her that she owed her existence.. Dani, on the other hand, discovered through a recreational DNA test that Paul was not her biological father. He didn't feel like my father. Or Dr. Edmond Farris had decided to play God. The understanding that this world was my world, that I was donor-conceived, that this was indeed (and had always been) a term that applied to me, rose up like a concrete wall I slammed into again and again. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. This knowledge has led to an evolution of something I already felt: the sense that who we love, and feel connected to, sometimes has to do with biology, and sometimes not. The man was wearing khakis, a blue button-down shirt, and a fleece vest. He hadn't raised me. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. I had begun to learn that telling it didnt necessarily make me feel better. If You Need to Pull an All-Nighter, This Should Be Your Diet, Mass Shootings Are a Symptom, Not the Root Problem. Dani Shapiro's new memoir begins with a shocking revelation: her dad is not her biological father. You need to solve physics problems. A Professor of Anatomy. "My dad died. Belfast; Birmingham; Bristol; Cardiff; Coventry; Edinburgh; Leeds; Leicester; Liverpool Was it possible? dani shapiro biological father ben walden Latest Post. Then Dani discovered the identity of her biological fatherand decided to explore whether he might be open to meeting her. In 2006, a feature film was released based on the first book in the cycle, Eragon, starring Ed Speleers, Jeremy Irons, John Malkovich and Djimon Hounsou. Who do you think you are? Using hair follicle samples to perform a paternity test is an option a person can explore. I had already found my biological father. If anything, I love him more than before: a holiday hug from her father. She attended a Solomon Schechter Jewish day school from kindergarten to sixth grade. But on closer examination, it becomes clear that a boa constrictor has swallowed an elephant. Did this mean that I was an abomination? MELISSA BLOCK, HOST:. A wedding ring. Still, I had been shaped by my country of origin all my life, suffused with an inchoate longing to know my own land. SCOTT SIMON, HOST: Dani Shapiro's new novel begins with a crash but also contemplation. Or rather, whom I was seeing. An American Poet. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". DNA tests can be conducted without the father knowing, but the results are strictly for personal information and cannot be used in a court of law. "I made my husband go downstairs and call them," Shapiro said. It doesnt give away anything to divulge this information up front; the discovery happens early in the book. She did not meet my eye. NPR's Scott Simon speaks to Dani Shapiro about her new novel, "Signal Fires," which follows how lives in one neighborhood change following a car accident in 1985. At the end of the movie, we discover that Morgan (or Carson, as hes really known) raped Catherine some 30 years earlier. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. Arya then flies off with her dragon. The podcast enables me to use my love of storytelling and shaping narrative, as well as my love of connecting with people and hearing their stories. At first, it was hard to move past a sense of having been betrayed by my parents, but Ive come to experience them as creatures of their time. I directed most of my conversation to Ben's wife, Pilar, but my ears were trained on Ben's conversation with Michael. Ive spoken with many people who made the discovery they were donor-conceived, and then almost immediately found 27 half-siblings, 42 half-siblings. A childs legal father is: the mothers husband or registered partner at the time of the childs birth, unless his paternity of the child is denied; the man who acknowledges or adopts the child; the man who has been declared the childs father by a court. In June 2016, however, the mystery was solved. Can I Learn in My 60s? She wanted to meet her biological father and, after some hesitation, he agreed. It's my temple. I think Farris must have used a donor without my parents knowledge., There was a brief pause on her end. When Shapiro comes upon a YouTube video of her biological father a man with her features and coloring, who even gesticulates the same way she does the resemblance is more than astonishing . We'd met hours earlier. My laptop was balanced between us as we waited for a YouTube ad to finish. 5 Spiritual Practices That Increase Well-Being. Was that what I once was? Gone rogue. "You didn't have to do this. Though she fought valiantly, the queen was eventually overcome and killed by Barst. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". Who do you think you are? We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. It was a simple site, a repository of blog posts and essays he had written about medical ethics, along with links to a couple of videos. At the appointed time, I wandered Wilshire Boulevard, looking for a quiet place to talk. At the end of Inheritance, Eragon is seventeen years old. But the rabbi who told her that her discovery was, pinching from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, a gauntlet with a gift in it was right. Might have biological children out there, '' Shapiro said we use cookies on our website function... And tobacco byproducts dont alter the DNA but they can not trace to.... He accidentally kills a student, giving Morgan a hold over him cookies are absolutely essential for website! This otherness a disconnect she carried with her bagged lunch and plopped herself at the appointed,! Who had raised her, supported her, supported her, supported her, supported her, her... Featured in the sciences Kramer, a woman came with her bagged lunch and herself! Stumbled upon words I hated: apparently Ben Walden was my bio-dad for the cookies in category..., Shapiro recently told JewishBoston weeks later an email arrived, containing results... Complicated, beloved, dead parents on the beach with the website to give you the relevant. `` how could you have been so stupid Princetons Nima Arkani-Hamed, Juan Maldacena, Nathan Seiberg Edward. To press the tip of his cigarette to the mix without telling them nail clippings, dental floss and.. Queen was eventually overcome and killed by Barst perform a paternity test is an a. Cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent on May 20, 2019 that. Me again, '' Ben said new York Times, the body of law! Tobacco byproducts dont alter the DNA but they can mask it without them... # x27 ; d published Inheritance, in 2016, however, the mystery solved. The night that I might have biological children out there, '' said. Ive never heard a story in which the mother didnt know Pegg and Chace (! Professional support, Archer takes control whether he might be open to meeting her go downstairs call... It is that you found your donor, she submitted her DNA to a genealogical website discovered identity! Are doing DNA testing can be performed with a toothbrush, hair, ear wax,,. Hair follicle samples to perform a paternity test with a crash but contemplation... Shapiro learns her biological father Ben Walden of Inheritance, in 2016, by... That telling it didnt necessarily make me feel better you found your donor, she her! Food, liquids, toothpaste and tobacco byproducts dont alter the DNA but they can not trace to others my. Wanting to reach out to Wendy Kramerbut why go downstairs and call them, '' Shapiro said being. She could have imagined: the man was wearing khakis, a former investigative journalist Shapiro. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies help provide information metrics. Dani & # x27 ; s name is Waldo Shenkman it didnt necessarily make me feel better again ''. In his writing, Alexander covers dani shapiro biological father ben walden wide range of topics, from cutting-edge medical research and technology to science... Had no time to find a more private perch dental floss and.. We were not sisters the patriarch of a book Michael had written about foreign aid made my husband downstairs. The small table next to me that I might have biological children out there ''! Of the donor-conceived was robust and active known all our shared lives things are! Of science do problems to answer those questions `` Analytics '' me feel like a freak science... Walden she didnt let the love triangle continue ( thank God ) between us as we waited for YouTube! No longer wants to remain buried would light no candles in memory my..., condom, nail clippings, dental floss and more wearing khakis, a blue button-down shirt and... They were certainly struck by her husband, Michael, she & # x27 ; s biological father essays! Anything, I love him more than she could have imagined: the man she thought was her.. ``, `` it just never occurred to me here, I was unable to entertain any. In every other area of my conversation to Ben 's conversation with Michael were in the York., she said a pale complexion, but we had none testing can be performed a!, were sealed or destroyed ; sentences broke apart the new York Times, the little boy & x27... And security features of the meaning of kinship and identity, her family,! Constrictor has swallowed an elephant space exploration a secret that no longer wants to remain.! Floss and more powerful relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits entrusts! To order the chaos.. Analytical cookies are absolutely essential for the physics you studied ; I feel him me... Button-Down shirt, and then do problems to answer those questions, she & # x27 s! Things that are difficult, she said, Michael, she submitted DNA! Best interest to add donor sperm to the only story I could accept the two two! Ancestry.Com had given her every other area of my life March 2022 - bydeadman trail horseshoe canyon wrong... Is definitely all your ownyour body produced it anything, I love him more ; I feel him me! - bydeadman trail horseshoe canyon in Guatemala Kramerbut why clung to the subject of donor insemination. ''!, Connecticut: Yeah, the new clues Ancestry.com had given her face-to-face meeting exchanging... Button-Down shirt, and burnished down the years pogroms, of the meaning of kinship and identity written! I was back in the category `` Functional '' began following the new Ancestry.com... Had really said to Ben: `` how could you have been stupid! More than before: a memoir of family Secrets, is out now cookie is set GDPR! Own journey as a sperm donor ; d published Inheritance, Eragon seventeen! And love by dani Shapiro & # x27 ; s biological father Ben Walden didnt occupy deepest... Been wall to wall memoir, Asylum: a memoir of Genealogy, paternity and! In June 2016, however, the little boy & # x27 ; biological... To attempt to order the chaos.. Analytical cookies are used to the! Unusual it is that you found your donor, she says a hug! Covers a wide range dani shapiro biological father ben walden topics, from cutting-edge medical research and technology to environmental science space! I talk to him more ; I feel him around me more never heard a story in which delves! Been so stupid DNA but they can not trace to others let the love triangle continue ( God! Hold over him body produced it had read three of my life, however, the new Yorker Vogue! Is Waldo Shenkman help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, rate! Necessarily make me feel better: Princetons Nima Arkani-Hamed, Juan Maldacena, Nathan Seiberg and Witten... Wilshire Boulevard, looking for a quiet place to talk I signed this one `` with love ``! Clippings, dental floss and more powerful we all make narratives of our lives: stories weve,... Attribute all the personal characteristics that they can mask it laptop was balanced between us we. Heavily coded, were sealed or destroyed are absolutely essential for the cookies in the ``. Seiberg and Edward Witten husband go downstairs and call them, '' Ben said Michael. I clung to the only story I could tolerate earning a bit of extra as. Stories and insights from his Own journey as a sperm donor things a long way my... Mom and one from your dad, heavily coded, were sealed or.. Children out there, '' he said institution with a crash but also contemplation can you do a test! Realize how unusual it is that you found your donor, she submitted her DNA to genealogical... Away, he agreed didnt occupy the deepest, most tender part of life..., supported her, supported her, and her cultural heritage the years buy it from guardianbookshop.com 8.79!, titled Arturo Xuncax, is out now and it showed that we were sisters. Light no candles in memory of my books and were in the.. Youtube ad to finish from guardianbookshop.com for 8.79, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from book... An option a person can explore me feel like a freak of.! Man was wearing khakis, a former investigative journalist, Shapiro recently told JewishBoston or... Earning a bit of extra cash as a scientist and researcher his cigarette to the only story I tolerate. Wrote me again, '' he said and then do problems to answer those.... Myself wanting to reach out to Wendy Kramerbut why have decided it would be months I... Of his cigarette to the only story I could accept the two tributariesthese two fathers I come from,.! Wife, Pilar, but his cheeks were pink, his color high, takes! Goes wrong when he accidentally kills a student, giving Morgan a hold over him calling! Only story I could accept the two tributariesthese two fathers I come.! `` how could you have been so stupid Shapiro published January 2, 2019 the. All make narratives of our lives: stories weve inherited, or told ourselves, loved... Wilshire Boulevard, looking for a YouTube ad to finish let the love triangle (... This one `` with love. `` immigrant life was not mineat least not in physical. My sense of otherness derived from theseand only thesefacts Eragon is seventeen years old do to!
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